As children we always think that our parents are the strongest, most loving, most intelligent people in the whole world – in short perfect. We always think they will have the solution to all our problems and never do we once think that they too have problems of their own. As we grow older we grow into our own selves with our fair share of insecurities and quirks. And we expect our parents to understand and accept us for who we are. But as we grow older we also begin to see the more human side of our parents. They too have problems in health or otherwise. They too have their own insecurities or baggage from the past. It is when we realise this, that our Perfect Picture starts showing imperfections that we never saw before. So how do we ever cope with the fact that our childhood notion of our parents being ‘perfect’ was as true as a fairy tale? We are told that beyond a certain age parents and children should be friends and companions. But how is it possible to achieve this? Or is it even possible? Maybe this is harder than it appears to be. Because acknowledging the fact that your parents are flawed too, or that they cannot solve all of your problems makes everything bad in this world very real. No one wants to accept that they can be wrong. So how can they suddenly make peace with the fact that what they believed throughout their childhood is not really the truth? The truth is that our parents too were children at one point and have grown up with the same dilemma. They have had lives before us in this world which shaped their personality. But every parent wants to be their child’s hero and so they vow to never let their children face any difficulties. But this again is not entirely possible as they are human and susceptible to errors. After all when emotions are extreme, judgment is clouded. And a parent will always have the innate need to protect their child from any harm they sense. This is where the twist comes in as children also grow up and want to make their own decisions, right or wrong. How then can one strike a balance? How can this relationship protect itself from harsh realities? In movies it is always the hero who wins and remains hero but reality is a bit different. We have to gauge the situation and think for ourselves, make a realistic picture. The answer to how to deal with the perfect-not so perfect parents syndrome may not have one correct answer, but ultimately we have to treasure the relationship and make the most of what is given to us. Maybe the children who will grow up to become parents will reach the other side of this bridge, but the cycle will still go on.
Very nice thoughts!