Virginia Woolf rightly said, “You cannot find peace by avoiding life.” Life.It’s the only thing you ever know.And it’s anything but certain. Although, and quite often, we trick ourselves into believing – a certainty over our lives.We call this routine.The [inherent] repetitive regularity of it offers an illusion of control.It makes us feel safe, knowing […]
Tag: Writer
On walls closing in
Bitten nailsRestless legs The walls are closing inIn my head The space fills upA million thoughts Future and pastA regret or a task I askNo answer An hour goes byThe walls seem closer Exhale I sayBut the breath is held in A whole monologue in my headYet not a syllable my tongue says Pressure buildsTightens […]
On raised voices
Raised voices.I’m familiar with you.You show up every time a threat looms. Oh raised voices, I’m familiar with you. Masked by pangs of anger.Usually hiding, is a fear.Of rejection.Of hurt.Or the helplessness that ensues. Oh raised voices, I’m familiar with you. Scared of your identity.Or the threat to it, maybe.Are you so afraid of another […]
On captors and convenience
I sat down at 7 PM to do my morning pages. I could lie and say it had been a busy day (even on those days I’d most likely be wearing the old busyness badge slash facade), but it wasn’t. It wasn’t even a chaotic day. If you discount some last-minute curveballs, it was actually […]
On representation
“As immigrants, we always feel an obligation to the opportunities we’re presented with, even if there are glaring red flags staring right at us. Be aware of this irrational gratitude.” – In saying this one thing Jinal Shah made me feel seen in a way I didn’t even know was invisible. This whole piece is […]
On my resistance to write
You have to write. What if I have nothing to say?What if it’s not good? Or good enough? Or as good as before?What if what I have to say doesn’t matter?No. I don’t want to say something. You don’t write because you want to say something. You write because you have something to say. Yes. […]
On the voices in my head
Oh the voices in my headThey say You’re not good enoughYou’re not enoughAre you sure? Oh I know youThe judgemental one Oh the voices in my headThey say You’re lazyYou’re arrogantSo slow Oh I know youCriticism personified Oh the voice in my headThey say You don’t work hardYou don’t deserve it Oh I know youDistrustful […]
#30: My Year of Magical Thinking
I could see the sunlight through my closed eyes, I could see it in the warmth that I felt on face, the warm hues taking over my entire body. In the background I could hear my family talking, I do not remember what. It didn’t matter. I was happy just listening to their voices amidst […]
On 2020
2020.A big year. Meant for big changes.The kind that takes you places. After all, it was the start of a new decade.Right? Personally, I thought I’d have all my answers this year.I’d named this year about knowing. Yet here I am, at the close.More questions than ever before. Questioning it all.From definitions [of productivity and […]
On facing it
In this time of awakening, the only way for our society to heal and be whole is to face our truths – as they are, not as we’d like them to be.